MY fiance has announced that we’re to live with his parents after our November wedding.
(Pic: GETTY IMAGES)
I thought we were going to rent a place of our own but he says “no”.
He insists it will give us a chance to save up for a deposit, plus it will be useful for me to see how his mother looks after him so I’ll be “fully trained up” for our life together. I cannot believe this.
I know his two brothers and their wives lived with my future in-laws for years after they married, but never did I think that he’d want that too.
Several times now he has tried to make me feel unreasonable for turning down the chance of free food and lodgings, plus his parents’ kind offer.
I love my guy to bits but I’ve just started seeing another side – one I really don’t like or respect.
The closer we’re getting to our wedding, the more bossy, demanding and emphatic he’s becoming about all sorts of things and I’m starting to get slightly cold feet.
The other problem is that my parents don’t like him and begged me not to marry him.
So I’ll seriously lose face if I finish with him now. How do I get him to understand that he’s asking too much of me?
JANE SAYS: Forget “saving face” – this is no time for pride.
Your wedding is only a few weeks away so if you’re having second thoughts, then you must speak now and tell your fiance that you’re unhappy with his plans.
Maybe living with the in-laws works for certain people, but it’s not for you. Alarm bells rang when I read the words: “fully trained up”. Ouch. What does he think you are?
A working sheep dog? Please don’t rush into this wedding if it doesn’t seem right.
Trust your instincts. Don’t allow yourself to be swept along or overwhelmed by others.