My partner slept with one of the midwives at the hospital where I’m giving birth, and now I’m worried she’ll deliver my baby.
When you’re giving birth, you’re under a lot of pressure.
The last thing on your mind should be whether or not your partner has had an affair with your midwife.
Unfortunately, for this soon-to-be mother, the possibility of that became all too real when she learned a little more about her partner than she would have liked.
“Found out on of the midwives has slept with my DP (darling partner), years ago etc pre me,” she wrote on Mumsnet.
“Because it’s a small team, there’s a good chance she’ll be my midwife.”
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She inquired, “Would you be okay with this?”
Many parents offered advice, filling over ten pages with their suggestions for how she should handle the situation.
While many tried to remind her that it had been years, others couldn’t stand it and said, “It would be a big nope from me.”
“There are already plenty of intense emotions swirling around childbirth without having to deal with that undercurrent.”
I’d request that she not be involved in your care from the start.”
While many agreed that it would complicate emotions, others were honest about her situation, saying, “I’d be fine even if it was a little strange.”
They reasoned, “Sometimes this is just the reality of living in certain areas.”
Many people were curious how the expectant mother learned this about her partner, so she explained: “They share who the midwives are on the FB page, and he was like oh this is awkward haha.”
“I’m not bothered by her in the least; I’m just concerned that it might be distracting on the day, and who knows what my hormones will do if she looks at him or vice versa.”
A few mothers said it would depend on how long their relationship had been and whether it was more than a fling, but one said it would make them feel guilty, writing: “I wouldn’t like it.”
I’d probably keep thinking about it and then feel bad about it because it happened years ago… not exactly what you want as part of pregnancy care.”
“Being stressed can slow labor,” one said, implying that her reaction could make childbirth more difficult.
“Concerning this could have an impact on the birth.”
I’d raise a red flag right now and ask that she stay out of your care if at all possible.”
“If you feel it would impact your feelings of comfort and security at a time when you are potentially vulnerable anyway (ie during labor), just ask for it to be recorded on,” one of them told her.
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